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Does your teen lack grit?

Does your child give up easily, avoid hard tasks, or lack confidence to try new things?

Kids today struggle to grit through something "hard" and push through to the end with perseverance.

In a sense, it`s not entirely their fault because we live in a society of "quick fixes," "a pill for every ill," "instant movie magic" where our young people don`t have to wait for the next episode - they can just scroll and pick and choose their entertainment (hopefully parents have boundaries in place).

Instant gratification at their finger tips.

Life is convenient and comfortable.

Grit is a character trait that is developed as a child learns to persevere through something hard or "easy" (because it may be boring) for an extended period of time.

"......let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us" Hebrews 12:1b

We need to show our children how to "run the race well."

In my group teen mentor-ship 101 coaching class, I offer an extra coach challenge for students to do each week for 10 weeks of the program. It teaches them to set up an intentional (SMART) action to meet the weekly challenge requirement.

Essentially, I`m helping them build grit to push through a challenge for 10 weeks, as well as build focus and attention so they are less distracted. This challenge actually builds their listening skills!

In addition, these challenges also help them rewire brain pathways to be more present without distractions.

Here are a few examples of the weekly challenges I set:

Before they begin, all distractions are put away.

The challenge is "the 3 senses exercise:"

  • what do I see

  • what do I hear

  • what do I feel

Week 1: Use your tactile sense of feeling something for 2 minutes (rub a leaf outside and feel the textures, hug a dog and feel the warmth of it`s fur, Go barefoot outside and feel the sensations under your feet etc)

Week 2: Use your sense of hearing for 2 minutes (listen to the noises around you - far and close, focus in on the loudness or quietness)

Week 3: Use your sense of sight and watch something for 2 minutes (notice the patterns & shapes of the bark of a tree, study the lines and colors of a painting etc )

You get the picture.

Up until 10 weeks.

I do increase the time challenge and add in a few little creative ideas :)

NOTE: The big idea here is to also shut off the "monkey mind chatter" and to focus on one thing at a time. The "chatter" is normally anxious thoughts or negative thinking patterns. Our thoughts take us away from being present so being aware of thoughts and then steering our attention back to the activity takes intentional practice.

That`s why this activity improves listening skills!

The goal is to do these challenges every day and to reach 80% follow through and if they made it until the end, they entered into a draw for an online gift card.

I support them each week with accountability and show them how to set an intentional SMART action so they would remember to follow through. They also fill in their charts as they progress through the challenges.

The first question students often ask me is:

Will there be a chance to make up for lost time if at any stage we need it in the challenge?

Although I`m a firm believer in "grace," and it`s reasonable to give a grace period, this question reveals something that I`m seeing in students today.

  • They seek easy, comfortable, & convenient

  • They are already thinking of failure before they`ve even started

  • They lack grit

Our brains need to be challenged and stretched in order to learn otherwise it gets bored.

Sadly, BOREDOM in learning is a thing!

How do you help your child with a grittier mindset?

In my Teen Mentorship 101 coaching class, I personally help your child build grit & time focus , boost resilient confidence and develop responsible independence so that you enjoy more peace and harmony at home.

Would you like help in these areas?

I would love to partner with you!

Coaching students in healthier mindsets towards resilient confidence and responsible independence and partnering with parents to create harmony at home and good family communication.

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